Today I am writing after a stressful night. I realized last night after talking to someone that my life isn't exactly where I want it to be. I am still falling short of my dreams and my ultimate goals. Unfortunately I am still up in the air when it comes to finishing my first leg of my university career which I was more than hoping to have finished by now. Everyone seems to want to tell me that I'm doing ok and that I'm better off than many others, but it just isn't enough for me at this moment. I want to have a fuller feeling of independence. To have the abillity to extend my reach to the stars and beyond. I have had so many dreams dashed up on the rocks of irony that it seems I can never piece them together...so instead i am melting them down and starting again. This time I will approach things in a seemingly more selfish way. This time no one will step on my toes or try to trip because I will swiftly move past them. This time I will turn a deaf ear to my nay sayers and will in turn listen to my own instincts and follow MY own ambitions and not someone else's expectations. "Its time to trust my instincts...close my eyes...and leap...Its time to try defying gravity." Old lyrics from Wicked...but they still do and always will hold true to my own story. I hope that my words can give hope to those who feel like they have lost all passion for life and living for their dreams. I feel like all those parts of me that were cast in darkness and strife are now able to breathe in the fresh air and find hope in the hopelessness. For all those who don't know what to do when you feel backed into the perverbial corner...just remember why you do what you do...remember your dreams...call back those passions that started you on your path to begin with. Only then will you start to achieve fulfillment in all you do.
I hope I have helped to shed light on all those dark places...not just in others, but in myself as well. Here's to a future filled with happiness and light!
TNWM
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